Post-wedding blues is something that is found to be common amongst newlywed women and their mothers. These post wedding blues are said to last anywhere from several days to many months.
As wedding planners, we make it a priority to make sure that our bride’s are the happiest of brides on their big day and after researching the effects that post-wedding blues has on brides, we wanted to make it another priority to make sure that our bride’s and their happiness are taken care of after their big day is over.
Symptoms of post-wedding blues consist of:
- Boredom & Sadness
- Feeling Uncertain About Close Relationships
- Struggling with Self-Identity
- Feeling Purposeless
- Extreme Exhaustion
We asked some of our past brides and their mothers if they had experienced any of these post-wedding blues symptoms and while a couple of them said they didn’t experience sadness after their wedding, a few others said they did.
Natalie who experienced 3 weeks up to a month of sadness said, “My thoughts were… ‘Uhhh what now?’ We had been planning for 13 months and then all of a sudden there were no more meetings, emails, planning or tastings. It was a bittersweet moment. The stress level went down, but the fun and excitement leading up to the wedding was gone.”
Mindy, a mother of one of our brides, said, “After Jourdin’s summer wedding, I was on summer break, so I found myself alone and lonely. I had planned everything except for post-wedding. It was so much fun to be surrounded by our daughter’s wonderful friends that we missed them all after the wedding. I felt sad and for a moment in time, purposeless; for months I had been busy with work and with planning, so every day was filled with purpose. When it was over and everyone had gone home, it was just me. I missed everyone and so many relationships are strengthened during those weeks, and in a moment, it is just over. That was one of the loneliest and quietest days I’ve known.”
While their post-wedding blues lasted for a period of time, other previous brides like, Tamra, felt an overwhelming sadness for a short time.
“I cried Sunday after the wedding. For 6 months of my life revolved around planning our wedding. The majority of my extended family and friends that I hardly see came in town from all over the US. And Sunday, after everyone went home, I sat down and cried my face off. I was so sad to see everyone leave because I hardly ever see them and now that the wedding was over, I was a little lost. So much planning. So much build up. And it was over just like that. It took a couple of days, but I got over it quickly,” said Tamra.
While it is totally normal & common to experience levels of post-wedding blues, there are also great & fun solutions to overcome them!
Natalie suggested continuing to stay busy. She coped with her post-wedding blues by crafting a lot with her mom and decorating her new home. ElizaBeth said she experienced these feelings and knew of multiple other women who felt the same way, but she dealt with it by looking forward to other weddings to attend.
“It’s all over so suddenly and then you go through a mournful period where you almost cannot believe it’s really over! After planning my own wedding and realizing how much work goes into it, I actually really enjoy admiring other people’s weddings because it reminds me of my own. So, now I just look forward to the nest wedding invitation!” ElizaBeth said.
In giving advice for mothers of brides coping, Mindy said, “I would say it’s important to have a definite plan for the days following the wedding. Make a plan with your girlfriends – a spa day or dinner and a movie; or best of all, go on a trip with your husband. It’s not a denial but rather a transition. Secondly, I would share an encouraging reminder that we have prayed for this day since that precious little girl/boy was born, so the days to follow are best spent remembering to be thankful. Acknowledge the bitter sweetness of the experience, but know that it is the beginning of a new and even deeper dimension of the relationship you have built over a lifetime.”
Rachel, another recent bride of ours, said, “As it gets further from the wedding and life starts to get busy again with other things you think less and less about the wedding. To move on, I talked to my mom about the wedding (the one person who loved to talk about it as much as me) and now I tell my friends who are getting engaged that I want to help with their planning.”
Rachel’s sweet mother, Lisa, said it best when she said, “There is life after a wedding and it is a full one.”
If you are a past bride experiencing post-wedding blues or you’re a soon-to-be bride looking to avoid them, focus on activities such as these for after your big day! ::
- Give you and your husband some time after your honeymoon to wind down before jumping straight back into work. Reflect on the great experience you just had together.
- Plan an evening with a few close friends and family to look at your wedding photos and video together. Sip on some wine and reminisce about all that happened on your special weekend.
- Talk, talk, talk! Talk to your husband, close friends and family about what your feeling. Don’t keep it bottled up.
- Plan a holiday party for your friends or co-workers!
- Start a book club with girlfriends or just one day/night out of the week when you get together and catch up.
- Plan some fun weekly date nights! They don’t have to be expensive. It could just be a night of your favorite show, pj’s, snuggles and pizza!
- Journal your thoughts. Put it down on paper.
- Encourage other newlywed women if they are experiencing post-wedding blues. Help a sister out and work through it together!
- Get together with your wedding planner to talk about your wedding and all the behind the scenes things that took place that you didn’t even know about. We don’t mind sharing after the big day and we want to see you again too. It’s a bittersweet day for us as well after spending so much time together and being apart of your lives. We want to see how good marriage looks on you.
- Seek professional care :: If you are experiencing extreme depression and you feel these tips aren’t or haven’t worked, we encourage you to talk to a professional and get the help you need. It is nothing to be embarrassed about. You deserve to be happy!
We hoped this little blog post was helpful to all you sweet women. We wanted to bring awareness to the topic to let you know that you are not alone and that it is very common. If you have any questions, shoot us an email or comment below. We would love to talk and help you kick those post-wedding blues to the curb!
:: Photos Courtesy of (in order of their appearance) ::
Nossa Arte Photography